Keeping Up Appearances. Or Pretending!

Aaaaaarrrghhhhh….Unexpected visitors and they’re in the front garden talking with my hubby! Any minute now they will make that slow ambling mid-chat walk towards the house and I am not prepared!

Do I go for Option A. Grab the hoover and do a mega fast run around the kitchen followed by a blast of the counters with a damp cloth to make the house seem in order?

Option B. Grab my make up bag and do a quick run around my face with foundation and mascara and a blast of Vasaline from the baby changing table for my lips…make thy self seem in order?


Option C. Grab my coat and throw a handbag over my shoulder and casually be jogging thru the hall towards the kitchen when they come in and tell them I’m only this minute after arriving in ahead of them after a crazy morning helping the needy. Voluntarily.


It’s OPtion B. Always! I can make excuses for the breakfast dishes still unwashed and on the table, for the children who are barefoot and a little bit sticky, for the broken handled sweeping brush which has been reduced to a size worthy of one of Snow White’s seven dwarf friends using it for weeks now and still unfixed! All of this I can pawn off as things I simply haven’t got around to all day but not me! I can never make any decent enough excuse for still looking a wreck in the middle of the day, hair unbrushed and traces of yesterday around my eyes. Our visitors are of my husband’s family so for me, as old-fashioned or Stepford wifely as it might sound, I wouldn’t like to let him down. I’d have visions of them driving out of here saying ‘Jeez isn’t S doing well for himself and running a great business there. And all the great plans he has, real impressive. She’s lookin’ rough tho. Ah, I’d say she finds it all a bit much, all them kids and the house and all…looks like she’s let herself go a bit doesn’t it?’…

No! Can not have that happen. No way! Even if it’s sometimes, occasionally kinda true…but only in a daily basis! x

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